Faraway so close.

I don’t know what will make me happy. Hypothetically, if I met and fell in love with someone tomorrow, would it make me happy? And, would I be happy because I love her, or because I love being in love?

I thought 'maybe', but then time steals things away. I’m back where I started and I’m tired. I’m trapped by my own limitations, and I can’t find a way out anymore.

Finding happiness shouldn’t be this hard. Finding things that make you want to go on shouldn’t be this hard. But I’ve run out of energy. Everyone leaves, and I’m no longer relevant.

I’m not fine, but I keep on saying that I am.

I’m empty, worn out, and I don’t want to face another day this way.

Call it whatever you want. I loved you. I still care for you. But I’m no closer than I was yesterday. I should be happy. I’m not.