Inside/Outside.

Sometimes we are all weak. Sometimes we need someone to be there; someone stronger than ourselves. A friend. A lover. Someone who validates us and affirms us on our journey. Some people find that in drugs. Some in music. Others, alcohol, or art, or silence, or family.

“…I raise my eyes to the mountains, where shall my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.” – Psalm 121:1-2

I feel slightly torn between two theoretical constructs. The humanistic cum existential psychologist in me believes that people have the inherent resourcefulness and capacity for change and growth. In short, that strength comes from within.

The Christian in me believes that strength and the resilience to do all things comes from God. As such, we are bound to live the gospel mission as best we can; and through that give glory to God. Strength, in essence, comes from without.

I think God gave us strength, and that strength is already inside us. Whether it be expressed through faith or through self-actualisation, and that strength is inherent to the human condition. In fact, self-actualisation (or the process whereby one becomes the maximum that he or she is) is in essence a secularised version of faith.

Is faith not searching for God? Is faith not the process whereby we seek perfection (ie: God?) and if that is so, isn’t the faith journey itself a self-actualising one? Whereby we become the best that we can be?

But I feel as if I’m falling short somewhere. Not quite fighting the good fight.

I believe that we cannot quantify faith as ‘total number of prayers said’ or some related construct. How I choose to express my faith is in how I live. My Christianity is part of who I am. Maybe that’s why I choose to always be open and accepting of other persons. Maybe that’s why I take so much time to be there for others should they need me. Maybe that’s why I am in psychology in the first place.

It’s a quiet Christianity I seek, and if I can change the course of a life, if I can touch people, and make a positive difference in their lives, then that’s enough. All I ask is for the grace to be there for others, and through that bring God to someone.

Not conversion by any stretch, but rather to share that little faith experience with someone else. Even if that person experiences that in an entirely secular ‘empowerment to self-actualise’ way, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that I live my faith, and through living that, be Jesus to someone else.