Sooner or later.

William Jennings Bryan once said, “Destiny is no matter of chance, it’s a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for; it is a thing to be achieved.”

That said, cast as we are upon the proverbial raft amidst the swelling waves and crashing tides upon a foreboding shore, destiny is elusive. What fate we comprehend is merely what a man can grasp with what little reach he musters. It seems therefore that we are adrift on a sea of chance, with no rudder or sails to guide us thither.

The circumstances may be sudden, the consequences yet awaiting in the ether; but time comes when you must choose. Destiny has a ring of finality to it. A sense of helplessness as we are borne forward by what vagrant winds of fate to an unseen but predetermined end. Much like Oedipus trying to escape his doom.

The many clamoring voices of my friends finally sounded the death knell to the protracted ruse that was Diane. Thing is, I feel bad about it, even though the secrets and lies were entirely her own. The idea of not telling someone face-to-face just riles me though.

Poon and Cheryl and Joanna and pretty much anyone else I’ve spoken to tell me that I shouldn’t feel bad because she’s not even tried to be a girlfriend. Mingyang told me earlier that it’s a good riddance because he didn’t like the way she treated me. Somehow, I’m sure some people will make me out to be the bad guy, but then again, those people don’t really matter in my life.

Suddenly I find myself in a relationship with someone who’s everything I’ve been waiting for. I should feel bad about it, but I somehow don’t care. This one, I really hope works out. I can see myself with her for the long term. That was something I never saw with Diane.

So maybe it is destiny that I sat out the secrets and lies just so I can get to this point where I can hold Char and tell her that I love her and know exactly what it means when I say it. Like Salman Rushdie once wrote, “Our lives teach us who we are.”

Point is: I’ve given Diane two years of chances to make good, to show she wants something more than the nice clothes, fancy gifts and parties. Time’s up. It was up in August when she never bothered to call.

I chose not to be with her. I chose Char, despite the bad timing and weird circumstances.

I’m not regretting it. It feels… right. Like it was meant to be. Like destiny.