Dear Shawn

I want to thank you for what she and I are dealing with. You have no idea how trying this affair is on my relationship. You have no idea how many sleepless nights, heated arguments, conflicted emotions, and feelings of complete helplessness I have to deal with and go through.

It is wrecking my relationship, and I will be damned if I let my relationship be pulled apart by something beyond my control.

By that token, understand that she does still hurt a great deal. The onus is on you to do something about it. It’s your mess that I’m cleaning up here.

And understand this: I am on her side.

Apologies you’ve said, but in every apology, there is an air of fighting back. You bury a hatchet only to toss down another gauntlet; you might not think that you are, but you bloody are. I have to live with the fallout, and it is exhausting.

So here’s how it’s going to go down. You will play a few games of DotA with her. You will not bitch or emo or be a sore loser. You will give it your best damn shot. Why? Because she’s hurt, and because she feels (quite rightly) that you just don’t get her. This is a symbol of that, and more.

But don’t play because you’re ‘humouring her’ or ‘humouring me’, this means a lot to her. Treat it with respect. Take it seriously.

Your pride and refusal to back down are the issue here. Be graceful about it. Fuck pride. You’re stirring up the waters whether you intend to or not. Avoiding her is only going to make things worse. Man up and take what’s coming. Do this, and the problem will go a long way towards being settled.

I’m not asking you to do it, I’m telling you to do it. I want this settled. I have lost my patience with trying to be forgiving or rational.

God help you if something happens to my relationship because of your mess.