Loneliness?

I tend to have very few real friends. I am aware that I am introverted and that I am difficult to get to know. I tend to keep to myself more. I suppose the pitfall of being a bit of a geek is that it’s harder to relate to people who are either ‘normal’, or full-blown geeks.

‘Geek-dom’ aside, it is difficult for me to mix well with white Australians. I make friends easily, but not enduring friendships. Perhaps it’s because I take things too seriously. Or that we just don’t click well due to cultural or conceptual differences.

No matter how I twist it around, I am Singaporean, and I still think like one (well, when compared to an Australian). Even so, I guess I am a slightly odd Singaporean who doesn’t quite fit in back in Singapore either.

On one hand, I have always found it difficult to mix with people. So it’s not just the fault of my circumstances, but also a personal problem. It’s easy to say ‘get out, meet people and make friends’, but its hard to pull off.

I really should try and get out there. It’s great that I do play Magic with other Aussie fellows now and again. There’s still a divide though. I do get dissed sometimes on account of my race. It’s the Aussie way to take the piss out of people, but it gets grating after the twelfth repetition.